one dreams his self while he is his self

one dreams his self while he is his self
vaguelooksfromoutbehindherlashes, i am but a shade.

Monday, December 29, 2008

070206

Dearest You,

How come you always read my mind? Even miles and miles away.. me amongst the wilderness and you consumed (in a positive way, who wouldn't be) in the City of Angels.. you are able to know when I am entirely too eager with wanting to speak to you or just feel closer. And at that exact moment, when I am about to admit to it all (my complete and utter love with your voice)/cave in and not just think about you, but hear you - you call. I guess you have always been a bit further ahead of me. A few seconds more in tune with what you know I want. Ah, I am rambling.. you are much more than just a few seconds ahead of me. Basically, just thank you for being.. so damn good.

So, like I said, I am watching A Swiss Family Robinson. And I will let you know that I am counting on you. Counting on you for what, you ask? For directing the generation's next classic movie. I am talking at least one film that speaks grace and purity. How is it that all these actresses seem like they should be named Tulip? Even the men have soft and simplistic voices. I do miss the times where gay was interchangeable with happy. Because that is exactly what Disney was about - gay dreams. Haha, now I know you think I am out of my mind. Okay, maybe 24 hours of North Carolina has already done me in. If there is something or someone you want to hold responsible for my utter craziness, blame it on Seclusion (capital 'S', indeed). But if there is one thing you can definitly be sure of.. it is that one of our homes WILL be modeled after the Robinson's bungalow (or mansion, for that matter).. quite obviously.

For as good as things are or can get, nothing seems unreal. Unbelieveable. Unimaginable. Without you. This realization could be depressing, sure. But knowing all I have to do is factor one thing into my equation to make times, seconds, memories worthy of memory and capable of being unreal, unbelieveable, and unimaginable makes everything and anything seem tangible. And this 'one thing' is something and someone I am not searching for anymore. I am not searching. I am not trying to convince myself. I am not trying to convince anyone else either.. of the importance of myself, whom I am with, and/or the activities I am consuming my with around. And the reason for all of this [change] is you. You are the one factor that I have, that I need, that I want, that I desire, that I inspire for, that I admire, and that I imagine for making each second a second to love. "Live in love, don't live and love" - you will always be held responsible for that quote.. and thanks to you - it is so easy to do.

I apologize for my grammatical incoherence and disconcern..
I am letting it flow off my tongue,

Chelsea Faye Leigh

2 comments:

Francis Lussier-Charron said...

'Live in love, don't live and love'.

Quote I love.

Claudelean Musee said...

Certainly an effective mentality.


I love it, too.